LDR Blues: The Challenges

You already know how my long-distance relationship began. (If not, read on the article!) He’s from Seattle. I’m from the Philippines. And with that, you could say that it’s not easy especially if you haven’t met your boyfriend in person. Due to some unfortunate events, we have only met personally two years after our relationship began. Here are some of the challenges we’ve faced along the way.

  • Different timezones. We are 15 hours apart. When I get home from work at 5 or 6 p.m., it would be 2 or 3 a.m. in his time. I totally appreciate him because he stays up late everyday just to wait for me. We used to sleep at the same time because his schedule at work before matched mine but now that he’s working in the morning, we just talk for a couple of hours, then he’ll go to bed. I’m so thankful with technology. Our Skype video call is open ’til one of us goes to work. I’m actually watching him sleep as I’m typing this.
  • Discouraging people. I know it’s hard to believe if this relationship is real. When people asked me if I have a boyfriend, I’d say yes but it’s hard to explain why we didn’t even have a photo together. People would warn me to be careful because he might already be married or it’s easier for him to cheat. People around him would have comments, too. We couldn’t change our Facebook status to “In a Relationship” because it’s just easier not to explain.
  • Doubt. A month after we became a couple, I broke up with him because I wasn’t sure if I was really doing the right thing. The break-up only lasted for 10 hours. On our 10th month, he broke up with me because he said he’s confused. He would still call me everyday and so we got back together after 10 days. I’m so happy because now we’re both 100% sure about each other. 🙂
  • No physical contact. It’s hard not to be able to hug him, kiss him, hold his hand and all that. Really. Another thing, I remember when my friend asked me this, “What if there are no sparks when you see him in person like you realize you are not really attracted to him?” Then I answered, “I don’t have any problem with his looks. I’m pretty sure, I’ll be attracted to him. What I’m wondering about is his smell. What if he has bad breath or body odor?” Haha. Good thing, I loved his smell. *suddenly misses smelling him :(*
  • Limited ways to express affection. We can’t even go on a date! 😦 However, this tested our creativity. One Valentine’s Day, I got a surprised delivery of flowers and stuff toy at my house. I would also send him stuff but it’s kinda expensive for both of us to do it regularly. Next time, I’ll be discussing more on how we handled these challenges. For the meantime, here’s a song I wrote for him… It’s called But I Do. This version has drums played by marcosgc, a drummer from Spain. My raw recording can be found here. 🙂

Lyrics:

My sun is setting down
While yours is waking you up
Distance is killing us
I hope you’ll never give up

People might think I am crazy
But they don’t know how I feel

I know we’re miles apart
But I do, but I do, but I do love you much
I don’t care if we’re miles away
‘Cause I do, ’cause I do, ’cause I do love you, anyway

I’m here, counting the days
Thinking how it feels to touch your face
Waiting for the day
when I can finally, finally, finally hold your hand

People might think we are crazy
But they don’t know how we feel

I know we’re miles apart
But you know, you have my heart
Even though we’re miles away
I love you in every way…

 

 

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